


when the lights come on

by watchforthorns



Series: a dash of miracle [1]
Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Non-Famous, Alternate Universe - Vampire, Growing Up, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan is a little shit, M/M, Misunderstandings, Multi, Overprotective Siblings, Park Jisung (NCT)-centric, because it wouldnt be a fanfic w/o misunderstandings, chenles the cutest little vampire and jisung is an idiot, id like to say this is all butterflies and happiness but then we wouldnt have a plot, renjun is half-vamp and v v gay for jeno and jaemin, that wasnt a tag before but it sure as hell is now
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-11-17
Packaged: 2019-04-16 18:10:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,005
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14170614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/watchforthorns/pseuds/watchforthorns
Summary: A quick list of things Park Jisung knew about vampires:1) They happen to be very short2) They're freezing all the time3) They're fucking crazy4) Nine times out of ten, if they're leaning in then it's to kiss you (and eleven times out of ten you should definitely kiss back)(a.k.a the chensung vamp-au we all needed)





	1. one thousand, eight hundred and twenty-five days ...

**Author's Note:**

> I've been writing this since Chenle's teaser photos came out (because dude he totally looks like a textbook vamp) and it's actually been killing me. And, just like anything I've ever written, it decides to veer away from Drabble-Land off towards Multichapteredville. 
> 
> Anyway, I hope you guys like it, even tho it's unbeta'd!!

At the ripe, bright, influenceable age of eight years, six months, and nineteen days old, Park Jisung met a vampire for the first time.

He wasn’t big and scary and covered in blood like those mean advertisements showed on TV, but he wasn’t short and pudgy and dressed in his school uniform like the cartoons his teacher showed in class. Instead, he was … well. He was really pretty.

Said vamp blinked at Jisung, a smile stretching across his face. His cheeks, puffy and squishy (kind of like the cartoon, actually), lit up a slight pink when he caught Jisung staring. The blush was a stark contrast against his skin, it reminded of him of when Johnny from 1270 babysat him in the spring and showed him how to dye eggs for Easter like he’d done back in America. 

The vamps skin looked like, well, the egg, and his cheeks kind of like the faint pink after it’d been dyed. Jisung hadn’t seen anyone this pale since … ever, actually. Not even Jaehyun, one of the big boys that lived a few streets down, wasn’t that pale. Not even Injunnie, who was mixed himself, was this pale.

Jisung stood behind of his mom, peering out behind her legs to get a better look.

The vamp had round face, a pouty mouth, not to mention he had, when Jisung squinted and looked even closer, the prettiest eyes Jisung had ever seen. They reminded Jisung of … he actually didn’t know. But they were pretty. Really, really pretty. 

His fangs were just barely coming in, tiny points peeking out over his bottom lip. He had a few scabs - some old, some fresh -  where the tips dug slightly into his skin. He was adjusting just like anyone else was.

The vamp raised a hand, kind of like he wanted to wave, but dropped it after a few seconds, instead nodding shyly in greeting. Jisung gave him a tentative smile in return.

“Jisung.” He looked up at his mom. “This is Chenle. He’s moving in with Renjun’s family. You’ll be a good friend to him, right?”

Jisung glanced between her and the vamp a few times, before stepping out from behind her legs. “Hi,” he squeaked, reaching out to grab his hand. “I’m Jisung.”

The vamp smiled. “Chenle.” He pointed to himself. “It’s nice to meet you.”

_(He, very vaguely, remembers his mom pulling him aside at one point, telling him he’d be getting a new neighbor. Jisung hadn’t really remembered any of their neighbors moving out._ _A new neighbor didn’t really seem like that big of a deal to him. He didn’t understand why his mom was making such a fuss. He nodded when she told him before tottering off to go back to playing. She caught his arm, frowning a bit._

_“Jisung-ah,” she said, “Can you listen to me?”_

_He nodded, pouting. He wanted to go back to his Legos…_

_She knelt down and looked him in the eye. “Honey, treat the new boy nicely, okay? He’s been going through some … strenuous times, okay? Be a good friend to him. He needs one.”_

_Jisung nodded again, harder this time, with more certainty. “Okay.”_ _His mom smiled, pulling him in for a hug, at which Jisung squirmed, her grip too tight for his rebellious eight-year-old bones._ _“Mom?” he asked once she let go._

_“Yes?”_

_“What does ‘strenuous’ mean?”)_

 

     ____

 

Age ten, and Jisung started to learn more about Chenle besides the fact that he drank blood out of a juice box and owned about a million dolphin plushies.

The first of many things he learned was that Chenle was technically dead and alive at the same time. He was also magic, as Jisung’s mom put it, but he couldn’t perform magic, which was still pretty confusing for Jisung’s pre- pre-algebra level brain, but he managed to kind of figure it out.

“Remember that he still has feelings, Jisung,” his mom said one day as she dried the dishes. “No matter what people say, he’s still just as human as we are.”

Jisung, sitting by the counter and waiting for another stack of plates to be handed over so he could put them away, made a face and said, ever so bluntly, “Why wouldn’t he have feelings?”

His mom stopped drying a cup. When she turned to look at him, Jisung almost swore she looked kind of proud. “You’re a good kid,” she said after a bit. “A really, really good kid and a really, really good friend for those boys.”

She must have been talking about Chenle and Injunnie.

Jisung stared for a bit, nodded, then asked, “Does that mean I don’t have to help with the dishes, then?”

A half-damp dish towel smacked him in the face.

_(The second of many things he learned came from Renjun on a cold, winter day, holed up in Jisung’s room. It was just the two of them, Chenle was back at the house, sick._

_“Vamps can get sick?” Jisung asked, more confused than ever. He thought it wasn’t possible for any of them to get sick. They couldn’t catch viruses or develop diseases. Hell, one of the reasons vamps were starting to be more socially accepted was because of their contribution to curing cancer. Quite literally._

_Chenle had even bragged about it weeks ago, plopping down next to a very, very sick Jisung, declaring that he couldn’t get infected and was, therefore, the most qualified to nurse Jisung back to health._

_Both Jisung’s mom and Mrs. Huang had found that to be the funniest thing. Jisung, tired and not really coherent, didn’t really understand the slight side-eyes and quiet giggles the two mothers exchanged._

_He snapped back to reality when Renjun started to explain that, no Chenle wasn’t sick, not really, more like just starved. Not like that made Jisung feel any better._ _“He’s the kind of person who doesn’t eat when he gets stressed,” Renjun said, gesturing randomly as if it'd actually help Jisung understand. “He ended up fainting, I think.”_

_Jisung nodded. He knew blood meant more to vamps than food did to humans. Jisung only needed food and air to survive, really. Chenle, on the other hand, basically got his air through his food, to put it quite simply. A complex process science hadn’t ever been able to explain._

_“Is there anything I can do to help?” he tried. “Maybe help him with school? Play with him more? I wanna do something…” he trailed off, voice lilting a bit at the end. Renjun’s face fell a bit, his lips pulling farther into a frown, and Jisung could tell this wasn’t a kid problem. This wasn’t anything Jisung could fix._

_Renjun sighed. “It’s fine. My mom’ll probably help him.” Jisung pouted, and Renjun, ever the people pleaser, poked him in the cheek, smiling softly. “You’re already doing so much just being his friend, Jisungie.”_

_“You sound like an adult,” Jisung mumbled._

_“Ugh, don’t say that. It’ll make me barf.”)_

 

     ____

 

At ten and a half, Jisung found out that Chenle’s problem had to do with politics. It’s the only bit of information anyone, even Chenle himself, ever indulged him in. Chenle, tucked under Jisung's covers, holds his hand, snuggles closer to him, and tells him not to worry.

And that was that. 

     ____

 

At eleven, Jisung started noticing the differences between him and Chenle. A big thing Jisung always saw was Chenle's eyes, pretty and blue and bright like the ocean, like the stars, like one of those blueberry smoothies they served at that cafe Chenle liked, though blueberries were technically purple ... Whatever.

Jisung loved Chenle's eyes, even though they're supposed to be stereotypical for vamps.

Renjun had a blue eye, too, though the other one was brown. That was kind of cool, Jisung thought, and also really pretty (something Jeno from floor two happened to vehemently agree with, much to Chenle and Jisung's amusement). But, the thing is, they weren't Chenle's eyes.

The most painfully obvious difference, though, aside from the windows to Chenle's (technically non-existent) soul, was, of course, the fangs. Duh.

They weren't long and pointy like they were always shown as in moves or cartoons, but they weren't completely dull, either. They were kind of flat compared to other teeth, with a wide, tapered point on the end, kind of like those fountain pens Jisung's dad always liked to use for fancy stuff.

But, of course, the most important thing about Chenle (and Renjun's) fangs was that, well, they also happened to look a bit like snaggleteeth.

Jisung, after having stared long and hard at Chenle's mouth as he, Chenle, and Renjun sat in the vamps' shared bedroom, decided that he should so mention this to them. So he did. Chenle, twelve at the time and still learning some of the more unusual Korean vocab, just blinked, cocked his head to the side, and asked what snaggletooth meant.

Renjun, his savior, per usual, whispered something in Mandarin, and Chenle laughed, high pitched and bright as he fell back onto the bed, clapping wildly like a seal.

_“_ They do look like that!" he managed between laughs, wiping a few stray tears away.

Another thing about vampires: they cried easily, though not just cause they were sad. It was just apparently very easy for them to cry. Which was kind of sad because, even as pretty as Chenle's eyes were, Jisung hated watching them get all glassy and watery and puffy, it just made his heart twist in a little, crumpled ball and -

"But mine will move back behind my other teeth when my they come in," Chenle said.

Jisung jerked back to the present, blushing. Renjun, as always, noticed and rolled his eyes, shoving the younger boy a bit. "Uh, what'll move?" Jisung asked.

"His fangs, dumb-dumb," Renjun said, and the implied 'or were you too busy staring to remember?' that was tacked on the end didn't really help with the heat in Jisung's cheeks.

"Oh.” Jisung paused, trying to think of something to shift the conversation in another direction. “...Do everyone's move?” he tried. "The fangs, I mean."

Renjun shook his head and pointed to his one fang. It stuck out a bit higher than the younger vamps and was a little more prominent than Chenle's, jutting out again his gums. “Mine won’t. It’s cause Chenle’s a pureblood. I'll probably have to get it moved when I'm older.”

Jisung, ever the detective, selectively ignored the who part about braces, input ‘politically involved family’ and ‘pureblood’ into his figurative brain calculator,  then gasped, turned to the vamp, and shrieked, "You’re a prince?!”

Renjun fell off the bed he laughed so hard, wheezes wracking his body as he clawed at the edge of the sheets, pulling himself back up onto the mattress with a bit of difficulty. Chenle, pouting like a cute, mochi-faced dolphin, shoved him off again.

Fangs aside, the other big thing was the whole growth spurt thing. Chenle had always been tall for his age, but he seemed to be growing another centimeter almost every day. He towered over Jisung by a good head and a half, and he never seemed to be able to let it go.

Everything besides that just kind of faded into the background. There were tiny, minuscule details that Jisung never noticed, not until other kids at school pointed them out.

Jisung hadn’t thought about Chenle’s hair - a striking grey/blonde - until Jeongin asked about it. He didn’t pay attention to how fast Chenle was until everyone was talking about how he beat all the upperclassmen in a race. He didn’t even bat an eye at the fact that his best friend literally drank blood to survive, not until he’d jokingly tried to take a sip from Chenle’s drink one day and was nearly tackled by the boy.

_(One second he was reaching for Chenle's drink, ready to grab it and finish it off like he always did with the other hyungs, just to get a spur out of them. The next second, Jisung was on his back, staring blank-faced at the box on the ground, then over at Chenle, who was splayed next to him, still reeling from his - oh so impressive, if Jisung might add - glomp._ _He looked like a deer in headlights, like lightning had just struck right next to him._

_Jisung blinked, once, twice, glancing between the leaking “juice box” and Chenle’s panicked expression before it hit him. “Oh," he said, smiling sheepishly as he sat up and rubbed where his back had hit the floor. "Oops?”_

_Chenle stared at him, it was probably the longest Jisung had seen him be quiet outside of class, before he choked on a snort, covered his face with his hands in a show of what had to be either frustration or pure, unadulterated hilarity, and then he absolutely_ lost _it, his laughs ringing through Jisung’s room._

_“You’ve gotta be kidding me!” he managed between giggles. “I can’t believe you just-” he trailed off into Mandarin, probably cursing Jisung out, and Jisung stopped listening, getting back up on his bed and staring down at his best friend._

_He caught bits and pieces of what Chenle was saying, something about idiots and blood and stupidity and being cute, before he decidedly tuned the words out, instead focusing on the way Chenle sounded when he laughed, pitchy and bright and unrestrained._ _Jisung always loved it when the vamp laughed. It reminded him of wind chimes and flower petals and dolphins and ice cream and anything and everything that made Jisung feel alive. It made him feel warm._

_Chenle finally managed to collect himself, pulling his legs underneath him to sit up. He smiled at Jisung, watching him through long lashes - just a bit damp from laughing so hard. “You’re an idiot, Jisung Park.”_

_Jisung snorted at the stupid nickname. “You know you love me.”_

_Chenle’s eyes sparkled like the stars, like the ocean at night, like the bright blue glitter glue Renjun used whenever he had to make posters for art club. “I do … Though I question it most of the time.”_

_“Hey!”)_

 

     ___

 

Age fourteen was a … weird time for Jisung.

Everything just kept changing at a breakneck pace and Jisung could barely keep up. For one, he shot up what seemed like a million centimeters overnight, something that both amused and pissed off his friends. Chenle thought it was funny at first, that was until Jisung started to use him as a crutch, leaning on his head or shoulder whenever he could. Not necessarily the best idea, both his pride and his shins could agree to that, at least.

Their friend group seemed to expand further, too. Donghyuck, another boy who was Renjun’s age, joined, along with Mark, who officially took over Renjun’s spot at The OldestTM. Jaemin, another half-blood (well, more like a 'quarter-blood' since his dad had been the half-blood, but whatever), kind of stumbled into their lives, after Chenle quite literally sniffed him out and dragged him to lunch one day.

Jaemin had moved to town months before that but hadn’t been able to attend school due to health problems (read: breaking his back after trying to do a backflip off his new houses high-rise porch). Renjun looked ecstatic to have another mixed kid, promptly attaching himself to Jaemin for a couple of weeks, much to Jeno's dismay.

Jisung thought it was cute but kind of annoying, even said it was out loud at lunch one day, but he was shut down by Mark, who literally choked on his water, raised an eyebrow, and said, “You and Chenle are literally ten times worse than that, though?”

And that was that.

Something else besides the size of his friend group seemed to change though, something that took Jisung months and months - and relentless teasing from Donghyuck, per usual - to pinpoint.

Everyone was growing up. Everyone was changing. It was actually kind of scary.

Mark, who’d been like Jisung's own brother for years now, actually started to look like a grown-up, which was one of the scariest things Jisung had thought of in a while. Though it definitely wasn't as scary as when he stared at Chenle for what felt like hours - though it was probably only a few minutes - and found himself breathless every time the vamp did something, anything, even if it was just grabbing his water or picking up a dropped pencil or even having a double chin contest with Jeno.

Chenle blinked, those stupidly pretty, vamp blue eyes glittering like a thousand drops of water in the sun, and Jisung saw practically stars fly in from everywhere, hazing up his vision. Chenle laughed, not as pitchy as when he was younger but still clear and bright and _beautiful_ , and Jisung found himself short of breath. 

Chenle stopped, looked at him, smiled, his eyes crinkling at the edges, his lips pulling up into a soft crescent, and Jisung was completely and utterly _gone_ , heat blowing up behind his ears and dusting over his cheeks, heart stuttering in his chest.  

The vamp had always been pretty to him, had always been ethereal and gorgeous in an otherworldly way, but this was … this was different. This was new. This was ...

_(Chenle sat next to him as they studied, legs pressed together, shoulders brushing, Chenle’s free hand intertwined with Jisung’s as he scrolled through his notes on his phone. Jisung’s heart skipped a beat, his breath fluttered, his mind clear and foggy at the same time.)_

… This was the start of something.

_(He and Chenle sat chest-to-back on the floor of Jisung’s bedroom, Chenle’s chin rested on Jisung’s shoulder as he watched the younger boy switch between playing games on his phone and searching up new dance practice videos._

_Chenle had been rambling for a while now, flitting between Korean and Mandarin as he chatted about his life and whatnot. Jisung hummed in agreement and commented on what he could in the far and few moments that Chenle stopped speaking._

_It was comfortable, casual, but it still set his nerves on edge having another person pressed so close. He was hyper-aware of everything, from the way Chenle pressed closer when he wanted to see what Jisung was doing, to the way the Chenle’s breath fanned across his neck as he spoke, cold and crisp, like a fall breeze._

_Pure-bloods didn’t need to breathe, something Jisung had learned years back when Renjun’s mom took him, Chenle, and Renjun to the local pool - on a cloudier day, of course. He’d nearly had a heart attack when Chenle hadn’t come up for minutes on end, then ended up chasing the vamp around the kiddy-section later when he realized Chenle was just messing with him._

_Chenle stilled breathed funny, though. It was always a dead giveaway whenever the older boy draped himself across Jisung’s back and sang “guess who~” for fun. He didn’t really breathe in, just out, and his breath was always cold like the rest of him._

_J_ _isung never really minded but … lately, it’d been confusing when Chenle was this close. Jisung never knew if the goosebumps that sprouted on his arms were from the cold or from something else, and, quite frankly, he was kind of scared to know._

_Chenle finished up a particularly funny story, laughing hard against Jisung’s back once he finally finished up. Jisung quickly paused his game before the convulsing dolphin-koala hybrid on his back could ruin his high score._

_He huffed, turning to face his best friend with a pout._ _“You’re loud,” he whined. “And heavy.”_

_Chenle’s eyebrows drew together as he frowned before a wicked smile took over his features and he leaned even harder onto Jisung’s back, practically crushing him. “Take it back!” he squealed through his laughter._

_Jisung screeched in protest. “You’re crushing me!”_

_“Take it back!” Chenle sang through his giggles._

_Jisung glanced back at his friend before planting his arms on worn wood of his bedroom floor and pushing back. Chenle let out a shriek of surprise, gripping tight onto Jisung’s shirt as he fell. Jisung, never one for being startles - especially during scuffles - lost his balance, toppling down with him._

_They landed on the floor with a thud and a few groans, Jisung’s shoulder digging into Chenle’s chest and Chenle’s head banging into the wood paneling._

_He scrambled to sit up, reaching out to pull Chenle up with him as he hissed in pain, fangs flashing. Jisung couldn’t tell if Chenle was mad or not, couldn’t tell if he was going to snap at Jisung, not until he grabbed Chenle’s face in his hands, examining his head to look for any injuries, and Chenle laughed again._

_He put his hand over Jisung’s, squeezing lightly until the younger boy finally looked him in the eye. “I’m fine, stop worrying.”_

_Jisung blushed, pulling his hand away to rest it in his lap. Chenle was still smiling at him, bright and sincere, and it was setting him on edge. “You sure?” he asked. “Nothing broken?” He sized the smaller by up, pulling his hand away to prod at him a bit, only for Chenle to wince as his wrist was moved._

_He smiled sheepishly when Jisung glared at him, but let him take his wrist in hand anyways. “Did you sprain it?” Jisung mumbled._

_Chenle shook his head. “You’re not that heavy, stupid. Probably just strained something. Nothing a few supplement pills can’t fix.”_

_It took Jisung a minute to realize what pills he was talking about. “The ones with the extra human nutrients?” Chenle nodded. “Aren’t those expensive, though?”_

_Chenle shifted a bit. “It depends on how potent they are, you know? Like, there’s some that’re like IV drips or something, and then some that’re like, you know, diluted? I can take those, probably, I dunno. I mean, I don’t get hurt often so I don’t use them too much…” he trailed off._

_Jisung blinked at him. Maybe he could … No, it was probably a bad idea, but … The whole thing was kind of his fault. “Wouldn’t drinking directly from the source help?”_

_He shrugged. “Well, yeah, but…” Chenle froze, his eyes snapping up to meet Jisung’s. “No,” he said firmly. "No, I’m not doing that.”_

_“You just said it’d help,” Jisung protested._

_“No.”_

_“Come on, hyung -”_

_“No!” Chenle snapped. It was the first time Jisung had seen him serious in a while. Jisung pouted, shrinking in on himself. He watched Chenle from the corner of his eye. Chenle sighed, slowly shifting to sit next to him and lay his head on Jisung’s shoulder._

_“It’s not that I don’t … I mean I wouldn’t mind it just -” he sighed. “It’s honestly so nice to hear that you’d do that for me, Jisungie, but I’m fine. Really. It’s not a life-threatening injury, and we never really drink from people unless it’s life or death or, you know, something we’ve been doing for a while, you know, like something romantic or whatever.”_

_Chenle’s cheek felt a little less cold against his shoulder, and when Jisung glanced down he saw that Chenle was blushing. “It’s okay,” Jisung said, leaning his head against the vamps. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay.”_

_Chenle smiled, all teeth and fangs, and it made Jisung’s heart skip. “I’m okay. Don’t worry.” Jisung hummed, and they sat there in silence for a few minutes, whatever game that was frozen on Jisung’s phone long forgotten._

_“Thank you,” Chenle said after a while, a blush still dusting his cheeks. “For trusting me enough to even suggest it.”_

_Jisung blushed, looking down at the vamp next to him. Chenle glanced back up at him, smiling softly, and Jisung smiled back, leaning against him and relishing in the feeling of Chenle next to him.)_


	2. thirty-five thousand and forty hours

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything said the same thing: vamps always, always, always fell in love with the people they bit.  
> Which was exactly why Jisung swore he was gonna do everything in his power to get Chenle to bite him.

Fifteen, and Jisung couldn’t get the thought of Chenle out of his mind.

He’d searched Naver a million times about vamps in hopes to see if they had something special about them that just made people feel differently. All he got was a bunch of political, racist bullshit, so he searched elsewhere, through books and through connections.

He’d thought maybe just everyone felt this way about Chenle. That maybe it wasn’t him.

Jeno (the newest addition to their group, as well as Renjun and Jaemin’s boyfriend - a very long and very complicated story Jisung didn’t even like to think about) laughed his ass off when Jisung pulled him aside to ask about it.

“No, kid,” he’d said. “Pureblood or half-blood, they don’t have anything special. They can glamour pain away, turn it into whatever suits a situation best, but they’re not witches. They don’t spell people.”

It didn’t make Jisung feel any better. Jeno had patted him on the back, told him he needed to talk to Chenle, needed to just deal with it like any other crush, but … but Chenle was his first crush. He probably had been for a while, it’d just taken Jisung and his stupidly thick brain forever to actually figure it out.

Sometimes he would lay awake at night and think about what it’d be like to have Chenle as a boyfriend, think about what it’d be like to hold his hand, what it’d be like to take him on dates or get him gifts or kiss him. God, Jisung really wanted to kiss him.

Half the time instead of actually studying, like he needed to, he was holed up on his phone searching through online forums that, quite frankly, he didn’t really trust, but they were always a place to start, not to mention people always ended up linking to actual articles Jisung could read.

Most of them were about straight up relationship advice, which was actually kind of helpful, but others were stupid cliche things … cliche things that also looked like pretty easy shortcuts. No matter what kind of advice it was, no matter who it was from or what website it was on, everything said the same thing: vamps always, always, _always_ fell in love with the people they bit.

Which was exactly why Jisung swore he was gonna do everything in his power to get Chenle to bite him.

 _(Maybe avoiding Chenle for a straight week wasn’t the_ brightest _of ideas, but Jisung couldn’t really think of anything else to try and get the vamps attention. He skirted around the vamp at lunch, left early for school, and only ever talked on the walk home if he absolutely needed to._

 _Again, definitely not the smartest of ideas, but at least it was doing its job, because on Friday Renjun, eagle-eyed and completely pissed, stomped up to him during lunch, poked him roughly in the chest a few times, and hissed out a sharp, “We need to_ talk _.”_

_Chenle, the closest to both of them, flicked his eyes between the two boys, obviously ready to get up and do something to stop it, but Mark, in his senior year and really not ready for of this bullshit, just put a hand on his shoulder and shook his head no._

_Jaemin took the less mature route, raising three fingers and whistling The Hunger Games theme._ _Donghyuck, wearing a shit-eating grin, like he always did, was only just starting to sing the chorus of ‘See You Again’ by the time Renjun grabbed Jisung’s shirt collar and hauled him out of the cafeteria and into the school courtyard._

 _“I don’t know what the fuck you’re trying to do or what the fuck is going on,” Renjun snapped, obviously miffed as he practically flung Jisung onto a bench over in the corner of the yard. “But you need to get your shit together because Chenle’s been stressing out for weeks now and you’re not making this any better. You're his best friend, you're almost a brother to him, so what the_  hell _are you_ doing?”

_Jisung gulped. “‘m sorry, hyung, really. I’ve just been busy with school and…” Yeah, even Jisung could tell it was a lame excuse._

_“That’s bullshit and you know it,” the half-vamp snapped. “You’re doing this on purpose or something. I can tell.”_

_“I-” Jisung started, but the older boy raised a quick hand, eyes hardening as he whipped out a juice box and shoved it into Jisung’s hands._

_“I’m not going to lecture you, because, honestly, I don’t feel like it,” Renjun said, scarily calm now. “Lele’s barely eaten all week, today included.” He gestured to the juice box in Jisung’s hands. “So you’re going to give this to him and you’re going to apologize and fix this so my mom stops hounding my ass about what’s wrong with Chenle. Okay?”_

_Jisung swallowed, glancing down at the box in his hands. A cartoon-ish pig dressed up as a tomato smiled back at him._

_“Okay.”_

 

 

 

_Hours later, and Chenle is sitting with Jisung on his bed, awkwardly staring at his lap._

_Mrs. Huang, looking a little more frazzled than normal, had unceremoniously dropped the vamp off at the Park’s place a little after school. Apparently, she and Mr. Huang were leaving for a weekend trip. Renjun was off with Jeno and Jaemin - doing god knows what - and probably wouldn’t set foot in his own house again until Monday after school._

_So, long story short, Chenle was rooming with Jisung that night, and Jisung was pretty sure he wasn’t going to make it to morning._

_It took almost a half hour of silence before either of them spoke, Chenle sitting on one end of Jisung’s bed and Jisung on the other._

_Clearing his throat, the vamp shifted to face the younger boy. “Have you been doing okay?”_

_Jisung, started by the sudden noise, jolted a bit. “Well, yeah. I mean, I guess.”_

_“Okay. Okay, cool.” A beat. Then another … and another. “Sorry, I, uh, I haven’t seen you in a while, so…” he trailed off._

_Jisung nodded again, finding purchase in the comforter that lay bunched up by his knee. “Sorry. I’ve been kinda busy lately. I know I haven’t been able to hang that often.”_

_“It’s okay, Jisungie. Really.”_

_He glanced up to find Chenle smiling hesitantly over at him, fangs catching the light from the lamps Jisung’s mom had shoved in the corner of his room._

_“I’ll try my best to try to reach out more,” the vamp muttered. “I … I really like it when we’re together.”_

_Jisung closed his eyes, swallowed past the lump in his throat, nodding again as he wiped his palms on his jeans. “I’ll - I’ll try harder, too,” he mumbled. Chenle hummed, soft and quiet and so, so unlike the normal, bright hums Jisung was used to hearing from him._

_He sucked in a breath, shuffling closer until his thigh pressed closely against Chenle’s. “I missed this,” he said, trying not to notice how the vamp froze up, swallowing around nothing._

_This was it. This was his chance. A surefire way to make sure Chenle would_ fall _for him. He just needed to provoke him._

_He held his breath for a bit, making sure to get his pulse racing enough to catch Chenle’s attention, then leaned his head onto the vamps shoulder and reach out to grab his hand, rubbing circles into his palm._

_“Missed this too,” Chenle replied, sounded just the tiniest bit winded. Jisung felt something akin to pride soar in his chest. He held his breath again, a little longer this time, tilting his neck - which was, to be completely honest, pretty long. Definitely an asset he could use - up further._

_He closed his eyes, let his breath tickle Chenle’s skin for a few minutes._

_“Is everything okay?” the vamp asked. “You’re only ever like this when-”_

_Jisung cut him off. “I just wanna spend time with you._

_Chenle gulped a bit. “Okay.”_

_Jisung took a breath, then another, and another. Okay. Okay. He could do this. Chenle was already compromised or whatever Jeno would say when he made one of his stupid Kingsman references._

_“Renjun-hyung said you didn’t eat,” Jisung said, pressing closer._

_Chenle’s face kept shifting between Jisung and the floor, his arms tensing beneath him. He looked exhausted, both mentally and physically, and it was killing Jisung, but it was almost edging him on, pushing him closer and closer until he was practically wrapped all koala-like around Chenle._

_“You need to eat, hyung,” he pouted._

_“Okay,” Chenle said, breathing deep, probably trying to calm himself. It was weird how things like that actually helped even though he literally didn’t need to breathe. “Okay, I’ll run home and get some food.”_

_Jisung frowned. Go figure, nothing was going to plan. “It’s late, though,” Jisung whined. “I don’t want you getting in trouble for waking my mom up.”_

_Chenle shifted back. He was actually shaking now. Jisung felt kind of bad, Chenle looked small, vulnerable, but this was his chance. Maybe he could woo him or something.  Jisung shifted forwards another in, his face mere centimeters from Chenle’s._

_“I won’t wake -” Chenle stuttered, face red, hands clenched at his sides until he finally snapped, eyes flashing red._

_“Jisungie, seriously, you have to stop.”_

_There was a bite in his voice, and Jisung could see his fangs glint from behind his human teeth - sharpsharpsharper than normal._

_Jisung backed off, scrambling back to lean against his headboard. In all his years of knowing Chenle, Jisung had never seen him flaunt his powers._

_He’d seen Chenle hiss at a few other vamps making unwanted advances on Donghyuck, he’d seen him wrestle with Renjun when they were younger, nip at his ear like a dog, but he’d never seen Chenle like this._

_He stared, heart hammering in his chest._

_Chenle shook his head, almost like he was trying to shake off a migraine, and Jisung could actually see the red bleed out of his eyes as they shifted closer to their regular color. A sign of being a pureblood if Jisung remembered correctly._

_Jisung breathed for a few more seconds, watching Chenle as he flopped against the other side of the bed, head hanging off the edge, arms thrown over his eyes, looking utterly pissed._

_He’d messed up._ _He’d really, really messed up._

 _Another few minutes passed in thick silence before Jisung got up._ _“Renjun gave me a box,” he said, moving over to grab his bag from his desk. He fished around for a bit, looking for the right pocket. “He told me to give it to you when we -“_

_“Then why the hell did you keep trying to get me to bite you?” Chenle hissed, head whipping up to look at Jisung._

_The younger boy stayed quiet as he pulled the blood out of his bag, the plastic of the box cutting hard into the side of his hand._ _Chenle sighed, sitting back up and crossing his legs under him. “Is this some kind of dare?” he asked. He sounded calmer, less angry, and his eyes were looking bluer the longer time passed._

_“Did Hyuck put you up to this?”_

_Jisung shook his head, moving over to sit on the edge of the bed next to Chenle and handing him the drink. They sat in silence, the only sound was Chenle’s straw._

_“I just wanted you to like me.”_

_Chenle looked up at him, cheeks flushing for a few quick seconds before he ducks back down to take another drink._

_“Of course I like you,” he mumbled around his straw._

_Jisung stared hard at his lap, hands gripping hard on his knees. “Not like that,” he mumbled. “I … I just wanted you to like me.” Chenle choked on his drink, eyes darting up to catch Jisung’s._

_He took a breath, turning to face the vamp. “Hyung, I like you. A lot.”_

_Jisung, half-amused but also like a hundred percent alarmed, watched Chenle freeze up and topple off the edge of his bed._

_It took him a few good seconds to realize what just happened before the younger boy let out a yelp and scrambled onto the floor to help the vamp, who was currently lying dead still on the floor looking like he’d seen a ghost._

_It was kind of comical if Jisung was being honest with himself. He stifled a laugh, settling softly next to Chenle. “You okay?” he tried._

_Chenle nodded, glassy-eyed. A drop of blood glinted on his chin, from the juice box, probably, and before Jisung even realized what he was doing he’d already reached up to wipe it off._

_“You like me?” Chenle asked after a bit, voice hoarse. “Like, you like-like me?” Jisung nodded, face hot._

_Chenle made a sound, maybe something between a giggle and a sniffle, maybe something between bewilderment and rage and happiness. His face dipped into his hands for a few seconds as he … laughed? Cried? Jisung couldn’t tell._

_It was almost a full minute before Chenle raised his head, looking Jisung in the eye and saying, ever so blandly, “I’m soooo going to kill Donghyuck.”_

_Okay, not like that was new or anything but … Okay?_

_“Just wait ‘till that punk sees me again on Monday,” Chenle muttered, more to himself than anything. “Ohhhhhh no, he’s in for a real treat that slimy little-”_

_Jisung blinked, sitting back again the edge of his bed to brace himself as he finally, finally started to understand just what was happening. “What?”_

_Chenle whipped his head to look up at Jisung, smiling sheepishly. “Okay, so, like, I might have had a crush on you since I was like twelve.”_

_...Okay … Okay … Okay,_ WHAT _?_

_“And like I’d noticed you been all like blushy and stuff lately so I thought maybe you’d liked me and I talked to Hyuck about it-”_

_Never a good idea._

_“-But he was all like ‘oh no he just has a one-sided crush on Mark-hyung you’re fine-’”_

_Okay ew._

_“-So I’d kind of like given up but not really cause I told Mrs. Huang that I could sleep over here for the night but it was really only so I could like confess to you or whatever but then like you kept trying to get me to bite you and I was getting really confused and-”_

_“You’re a dumbass,” Jisung muttered to himself, wiping his face with his palm. His cheeks were hot but his eyes were stringing and god god god he was so happy. “I’m a dumbass, too.”_

_Chenle laughed awkwardly. “Surprise?” He shifted closer to Jisung, resting his head on the younger boys shoulder. It was cold, per usual, but Jisung loved it._

_It’d been a while since Chenle had cuddled with him. Jisung smiled at the vamp for what seemed like the millionth time in the last few minutes, leaning his head against Chenle’s._

_There were a few more seconds of silence before Chenle sighed. “You really like me? Really?”_

_Jisung nodded. “Oh course, hyung. I just … I dunno. I’m not good at showing it.”_

_Chenle rolled his eyes. "Yes you are, you idiot. I was going around for weeks thinking like liked me back before I was stupid enough to believe what Donghyuck said.”_

_“Not the smartest move.”_

_“Honestly,” Chenle hummed, the sound reverberating down Jisung’s arm. He was quiet for a bit, then … “Hey, Jisungie?”_

_“Yeah?”_

_“Can I ask why you like me?”_

_“Oh. Um. I … I dunno.” Jisung moved to lay on his bed, hanging his head over the edge next to Chenle. “Um. Well, I guess it’s cause you sound really pretty when you laugh. And cause your eyes are really nice, they’re kind of like the ocean?”_

_He was rambling now, heat crawling up the back of his neck. It trickled past his ears, dusted across his cheeks like sand shifting on the ground._

_The look on Chenle’s face was worth it all. His head was tilted back, staring at Jisung in wonder and amazement. A small smile danced on his lips, faint, crooking up at the corners._

_It made Jisung’s head spin._

_He cleared his throat and kept going. “Like, they change when you talk. When you’re happy it’s like they sparkle, and when you’re sad it’s like the tides are changing or whatever. It’s … it’s probably mostly cause you remind me of warm things.”_

_Chenle laughed, soft and breathless. “I’m barely alive, Jisung-ah,” he huffed. “I’m colder than cold.”_

_“Well, yeah, but when I’m with you it’s like …” he paused, wracking his brain for something, anything he could compare Chenle to. “It’s like summer at night with fireflies and campfires and lemonade.”_

_Chenle was still for a while, breathing slowly, languidly, before he reached out, wrapping his arms around Jisung’s back and burying his face in Jisung’s shoulder._

_“You’re like spring to me,” he mumbled. Jisung closed his eyes, raised his hands to hold onto Chenles, intertwining their fingers and syncing their breaths together. “You’re soft and warm and so much like home sometimes it just makes my chest hurt.”_

_“You basically don’t have a working heart or lungs, Chenle.”_

_“Shush!” Chenle hissed. “I’m trying to be poetic.” He sounded mad, annoyed, even, but Jisung could feel the vamp smiling against his shoulder._

_“Doing a bit of a shit job,” he poked back._

_Chenle slapped him on the chest, hard, and Jisung’s giggles quickly turned into full out laughter as Chenle scowled at him, looking every bit of the pissed off kitten he truly was._

_“You’re an idiot,” Chenle sniped, smiling. “I don’t even know why I like you.”_

_Jisung snorted. “I don’t either.”_

_The silence came back, less stifling this time, and Jisung’s laughter died down. Chenle looked almost ethereal staring up at Jisung, eyes sparkling brighter than ever before, and Jisung could practically feel the emotions that crackled through the air._

_“Hyung?”_

_“Mm?”_

_“Can I kiss you?”_

_Chenle blinked, once, twice, his face flushing the slightest of pink. “I - I mean … I just ate,” he mumbled._

_Jisung leaned in closer, resting a shaking hand on Chenle’s cheek and hoping - praying - that the vamp couldn’t tell how nervous he was. “I honestly don’t care.”_

_“I-” Chenle looked at him, his eyes practically vibrating with how much they shook, and cleared his throat. “Yeah. Okay. Yeah.”_

_And he closed his eyes, hands slinking back around Jisung’s neck as the younger pressed their lips together, and Jisung truly, fully, wholly understood what Chenle meant when he called this ‘home.’)_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wait, shit hits the fan next chap :) <3


	3. three million, one hundred fifty-three thousand, and six hundred minutes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shit hath hit thyn fan, mah peeps

Sixteen, and Park Jisung was ten-thousand percent sure he was irreversibly, undeniably, inexplicably in love ... and nobody knew. No one, not a single soul besides him and Chenle, even though it was always so evident on Jisung’s face.

He had that honeymoon glow, as Jaemin liked to call it, though everyone thought it was just because he’d managed to get a solo spot on the towns dance crew at such a young age.

Donghyuck had broken a few months in and asked Jisung what had happened, said Chenle was planning on talking to the younger boy about if Jisung had a crush on him or not, asked if they’d ever brought it up.

He’d looked worried, kept glancing back at Renjun, who was no doubt listening in best he could, so Jisung lied through his teeth, told him they’d cleared up the misunderstanding, teased him to worry less about him and Chenle and more about his relationship with Mark.

It’d hurt to lie to Hyuck, even more so to Renjun, especially since both boys were like actual brothers to him.

But Chenle had made it clear that their friends couldn’t know, especially Mrs. Hwang, and even more especially Renjun himself.

Jisung didn’t really understand, had always thought of Renjun as his biggest supporter when it came to him and his complex relationship with Chenle, but Chenle made him promise, looked him in the eye and kissed him hard enough to bruise and begged him not to tell.

Jisung had pulled back, furrowed his eyebrows, asked quietly, “Is it one of those political family things?”

And Chenle just held his hand tighter, his eyes shaking as he stared at the ground, and Jisung reached up, rubbed a finger across his cheek and pecked a kiss on his nose and whispered a soft “I promise” back.

Chenle nodded, mumbled a broken apology, and buried his face in Jisung’s chest.

He didn’t move for what seemed like hours, and Jisung swore to himself he wasn’t ever going to ask again.

_(Chenle hummed a soft tune from where he sat on Jisung’s kitchen counter, stealing another strawberry from the younger boys freshly cut pile and shooting him a smile when Jisung gave him the stink eye._

_“You can’t even eat it,” Jisung grumbled, putting down the knife - a small, stainless steel blade, the only knife in the house his mom let him near._

_Chenle’s grin widened as Jisung shifted to face him, wigging the fruit a bit to taunt him. “Yeah, but it gets me attention, so….”_

_Jisung couldn’t help the soft smile that spread across his face. Chenle was just barely taller than him like this, perched cross-legged on the counter and beaming down at him like a miniature moon, bright and soft and warm._

_He let out a sigh, dipping forward to give the vamp a kiss. Chenle met him halfway, raising a hand to cup his face. Jisung leaned into the touch, relished in the coldness of Chenle’s palm, the feeling over the older vamps eyelashes fluttering shut against his cheek._

_He pulled away after a few seconds and Chenle pouted._

_“Your kisses are always so short,” he huffed, playing with the hair at the nape of Jisung’s neck._

_“Kinda like you,” Jisung quipped, smiling again when Chenle glowered cutely at him, cheeks puffing up._

_He’d gotten taller, not as tall as Jisung, though, and his eyes seemed to have more of a sparkle, his jaw more definition, and Jisung could barely look away half the time._

_He pulled his mind back on track, tearing his eyes from Chenle’s with a bit of difficulty, something that seemed to have the vamp preening with pride._

_“Put the strawberry back, LeLe,” Jisung said._

_“Only if you kiss me again.”_

_Not really much of a deal, but okay. Jisung smiled, leaning closer until their noses were brushing. Chenle’s breath hitched a bit, and he reached over to drop the slice back onto the cutting board._

_His breath ghosted Jisung’s lips. “Happy?” he asked, slinking his hands up onto Jisung’s shoulders, touch light._

_Jisung hummed as the vamp intertwined his fingers behind Jisung’s neck, wrapping his arms around Chenle’s waist in return. “Very,” he said, and he leaned in to seal their lips together._

_A few minutes later, Mrs. Park opened the front door, calling out a quick hello as she made her way to the kitchen, finding her son, alone, cutting some strawberries for dessert like she’d asked him to.)_

 

_____

 

Keeping the secret was one of the harder parts of their relationship, for sure, but something else always seemed to nag at the back of Jisung’s brain whenever he ‘hung out’ with Chenle.

One time, a good six months after the Confession Smackdown - as Chenle liked to oh-so-endearingly call it - Jisung had gotten up from his position on Chenle’s lap, sitting back against the edge of his bed, looking his now _very_ confused boyfriend in the eye, and unceremoniously blurted, “I wanna take you out on a date.”

_(Chenle blinked at him for a few seconds, still registering the fact that his boyfriend literally just broke up a makeout session to ask him on a date, before a smile - one of those sharp, vivid smiles that always blinds Jisung - started etching itself onto his face._

_“Like this one?” he tried, almost cheekily, leaning forward again in hopes of picking up where they’d left off._

_Jisung jabbed at him with his foot, electing a high pitched giggle from the vamp, before motioning for Chenle to sit next to him. “No, dummy,” he said as Chenle scooted his way over._

_“I mean like a real date.”_

_The stars in Chenle’s smile dimmed a bit. “Jisung,” he tried._

_“I wanna take you out for ice cream,” Jisung huffed, exasperated. “I wanna treat you to coffee or go to the beach-”_

_“Can’t really do strong UV rays, remember?” Chenle butted in, leaning up on the tips of his fingers to nuzzle his nose against Jisung’s neck._

_Jisung ignored the distraction, though, picking up some heat in his voice. “I wanna go with you to see a movie and watch fireworks,” he said. “I wanna watch the stars with you, Chenle.”_

_He put a hand on the vamps cheek, and Chenle, albeit sheepishly, raised his head to look the younger boy in the eye._

_“I wanna treat you, okay?”_

_Chenle was quiet for a bit. Then, “I’m the rich one,” he said with a small smile. “You’re supposed to be the sugar baby, not me.”_

_Normally, Jisung would’ve laughed. He would’ve rolled his eyes at the joke and swatted at Chenle’s arm and they would’ve passed the whole situation by. But he wasn’t going to fall for that today._

_“I’m being serious, Chenle,” he mumbled. “I wanna take you on out a date.”_

_The vamp paused. “I … I want you to take me out, too,” he mumbled. “I really do, but if someone sees us…”_

_“Who’s gonna notice?” Jisung huffed, a fuzz of annoyance creeping up on his skull._

_“Renjun, Donghyuck, anybody with a set of fangs,” Chenle tried._

_Jisung scoffed. “You overestimate yourself.”_

_“You underestimate me,” Chenle hissed, fangs flashing. “I went out for coffee with Jaehyun-hyung back in middle school and came home to a lecture on emotional maturity and duty to the colony, so don’t you dare say we’ll be fine.”_

_Jisung sucked in a breath, trying to calm the anger bubbling at the back of his skull. “That was years ago, Chenle, come on. Mrs. Huang loves you, she wouldn’t-”_

_“She’s bound by oath, Jisung,” Chenle said, eyes rolling in annoyance. “It doesn’t matter how much she loves me, it’s still her job to make sure I’m doing what my parents want me to.”_

_Jisung frowned. “We can just say we’re studying, LeLe.” Maybe that way they would pass it off just like normal. Sure, they always studied in Jisung’s room, but Chenle could just lie and say they wanted a change of pace or something._

_“Please,” he tried, reaching out a hand for his boyfriend, “just let me-”_

_“No!” Chenle snapped, and Jisung actually flinched this time, jumping a good space away from him. The vamp seemed to cool down almost instantly, sighing and running his hands through his hair and gnawing at his lips until Jisung shuffled back over and put a hand on his shoulder._

_“I’m sorry, Sungie, I really am,” Chenle mumbled. “It’s harder, with you. I … made the mistake of letting Renjun know that I liked you, really, really liked you, and now I,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair._

_Chenle sucked in one of his fake breaths, but it turned into what sounded more like a sob, and he tucked his legs closer to his chest, peeking out from behind his knees at Jisung. There was something in his eyes, something Jisung could give a name to, but wouldn’t._

_It’d be harder to admit everything if he did._

_Maybe it could be dulled down to sadness, desperation, regret. Jisung didn’t know how he could make it easier to swallow, but he never wanted to see Chenle like that again._

_Leaning over, he wrapped an arm around the vamps shoulders, ignoring the way how much colder than normal he was._

_“That day,” Chenle choked out. “The day when you confessed, I was supposed to turn you down, friendzone you, something_ other _than kiss you.”_

 _He let out a wet laugh. “You’d been avoiding me, and Renjun had been, well, pretty much yelling at me daily for letting myself fall when I had such a big responsibility to doing anything_ but _that.”_

_Jisung reached out to brush a few budding tears from the older vamps lashes._

_“I hadn’t been eating,” Chenle explained. “And he’d just, I dunno, had enough, so he said he’d get you to come over, but I had to…” he looked up at Jisung, lips trembling. “I had to say no. I_ should’ve _said no.”_

_Jisung tried, and failed, to bite back the flinch that tore through his body._

_Chenle laughed, less of something bitter and more of something sad, wrecked, broken. “It would’ve been easier, but I just liked you too much.”_

_Jisung was quiet._

_“I’m such a bad boyfriend,” Chenle muttered. “You can’t take me out on dates, you’re not allowed to tell anyone about us. We can’t even hold hands in public.”_

_Jisung bit his lip. “You should’ve told me, hyung. I … I wouldn’t have pushed you if you had. You have to start telling me things, LeLe, otherwise, I won’t … I won’t know what to do.”_

_Chenle nodded. “I know. I know, I should’ve. I’m just so used to keeping it all to myself, I guess.”_

_Jisung was quiet for a bit, then, “Was that our first fight?” he asked timidly._

_His boyfriend looked like he wanted to vomit. “Don’t be one of those stupid saps that document everything, jesus fuck. We fought and made up, done.”_

_The floor hurt when he got shoved off the bed, but, upon further inspection, it was okay compared to looking up and seeing Zhong Chenle smiling down at him._

_Jisung grinned and sat up to place a kiss on the vamps temple. “Okay, how about this. You start by telling me about this whole … thing with your family, okay?”_

_The vamp sighed, snuggling his head into Jisung’s chest._

_“Okay. Okay, so … so I was sent here because my parents are overprotective. I love them, but they’re constantly breathing down my neck. So they sent me here, and told me I’d go back when it was time for me to get married.”_

_Chenle glanced at him at that part, a quick smile flashing on his face, and Jisung choked back the million questions that burst up his throat._

_“Renjun and his mom were sworn to protect me,” Chenle continued, “but also to give monthly reports back to my family.”_

_He stopped, raising his eyebrows at jisung as if to ask “is that enough info for you?” Jisung frowned at him, nudging him in the shoulder._

_“Report back about…?” he tried, ignoring the very fat, very obvious elephant in the room._

_Marriage..._

_Chenle sighed. For once in his life, he looked like he wasn’t happy to talk about something._

_“About how I was growing,” he explained. “How my personality was coming along, who I liked, how I got along with humans.”_

_The vamp was silent for a bit, eyes downcast. “I’m … I’m allowed to make friends, but I can’t meet anyone romantically. I’m technically engaged to the great nephew of Hong Kong’s colony, but …” Chenle glanced over at Jisung, smiling sheepishly._

_Jisung laughed nervously._

_“Am I at least better looking than him?” he tried._

_Chenle snorted. “Not by a long shot. Yukhei’s practically a god.”_

_Jisung frowned._

_Chenle giggled, leaning in to peck him on this lips. “But he’s too loud for me. I like my awkward 'Sungie better.”_

_“I’m not sure how to feel about that.”_

_Chenle ignored the quip and just kissed him again._

_“Would … would we still be able to,” Jisung blushed. “You know... if it was all called off. That happens a lot, right.” He was being hopeful, too hopeful, but it was better than resignation, better than admitting defeat._

_Chenle sighed. “It might be. Hong Kong is looked into getting better ties with Seoul, and we vamps always think marriage is the quickest way.” He paused after a quick eye roll. “But, no, we probably wouldn’t be allowed, even if I_ wasn’t _engaged.”_

_“Why not?” Jisung tried. “You’re literally staying with a mixed family. It’s … it’s not like we can’t be together, right?”_

_“Mrs. Huang was a special case,” Chenle sighed. “She’s from Jilin’s colony, but she was the leader's niece, and she was supposed to be married to my uncle, but she fell in love with a human instead.”_

_“But they got married?” Jisung pushed._

_“They barely got out alive, Jisung,” Chenle said, fingers flexing around his arms. He was pressing so hard Jisung was worried the vamp was going to leave a bruise._

_“Most humans aren’t allowed into colonies unless they’re turned or concubines, but Mr. Huang didn’t want to be a vamp, and he wasn’t interested in being paraded around. So she went through a formal case and was disowned.”_

_He fiddled with his shirt a bit. “She got lucky. Really lucky. The Lai clan-” he paused, looking at Jisung. “They run the Taiwanese colony,” he explained._

_Jisung nodded in understanding._

_“They took her in so she wouldn’t be hunted by the government for being a rogue,” Chenle continued._

_“It was really hard. She was high up on the food chain. All of China’s other coastal colonies, us included, saw it as a betrayal. It wasn’t until they needed someone outside of China to watch me before Shanghai forgave her. Jilin and the others still haven’t.”_

_Jisung opened his mouth, then closed it._

_“That sucks,” he said after a bit._

_Chenle collapsed into a mini giggle fit, curling up even further into Jisung’s chest, the tension of the situation suddenly broken._

_“I lay my heart out for you,” he snorts. “Expose my dark past I’ve been hiding since I was nine, and you just say it sucks?”_

_Jisung froze._

_Shit._

_Chenle’s giggles turned into full flow laughter as he clutched onto Jisung’s flannel. “God, I love you.”_

_Jisung cupped Chenle’s face and brushed a thumb over the vamps cheek._

_The older boy practically melted into the touch, nearly purring at the warmth. He reached up and brushed a hand over Jisung’s throat, something that made the human’s breath hitch, before trailing his fingers back down and resting them over Jisung’s heart._

_“I love you,” Chenle whispered. “Shit, I love you more than should be legal.”_

_Jisung held back an eye roll, instead smiling again at his boyfriend._

_He was cheesy, but Jisung loved him, too._

_“You’re home, Jisung,” Chenle whispered, and jisung could feel himself softening, could feel his heart melt. “You’re warmer and softer and sweeter than anything on this earth.”_

_“Jeez, wait to bring up my pride,” Jisung poked._

_Chenle scoffed. “You’re still a man even if you’re soft, ‘Sungie. Besides, I think that’s what I need.”_

_Jisung brushed back the vamps bangs, the cold skin of Chenle’s forehead soothing against his lips._

_“I’ve been coddled and protected my whole life, ‘Sungie,” Chenle said. “You make me feel strong. Like I’m not broken. Like I don’t need protecting or policing.”_

_He looked up, his starry eyes a little less twinkly than before, and cupped Jisung’s face. “You can leave now,” he managed, voice soft. “You_ should _leave now.”_

_Jisung bit down a yell, quelled back his anger at even the idea of Chenle trying to drop him just to make it easier for Jisung. He gripped Chenle’s wrist tight, held him in place, even though he knew the vamp could easily tear away at any moment if he really wanted._

_“We can do things, ‘Sungie,” Chenle whispered. “We can make people feel things, think things. If they catch us, if they catch you, they’ll do things. They can’t hurt me, but they’ll make you forget, turn your love to hate.”_

_Jeno had mentioned that, but he said it wasn’t harsh, said it was just something that could sway someone’s feelings. Jaemin and Renjun would never lie to him, Jisung would bet his life on it. Chenle was just worrying again._

_“I’ll fight it,” Jisung said. “I’m strong.”_

_“No, ‘Sungie,” Chenle said. His voice carried something that tore at Jisung’s heart._

_“You’re not.”_

_A light lavender hummed to life in his eyes, growing in intensity until suddenly a wash of exhaustion ran through Jisung’s veins. His eyelids dropped, grip relaxing, until he suddenly found himself slumped over Chenle’s lap, no strength left in his bones to even pick himself up._

_Chenle’s eyes filtered back to blue, worry wrinkling his face as Jisung let out a quick breathe, turning over to lie on his back and rest his head on Chenle’s thighs._

_God, his head hurt. His_ heart _hurt._

_Chenle reached out to card a hand through Jisung’s hair. “I’m giving you a chance, ‘Sungie. To be safe.” He didn’t sound like he wanted it, didn’t sound like he was honest. No, Chenle sounded like someone who had a gun held to their head, like he was doing something he would never have done unless pressure by his situation._

_Fear makes people do crazy things, Jisung reminded himself, biting back the hurt in his chest._

_“We’ll be different, yeah?” he tried, voice cracking. “We’ll make it work. LeLe.” He reached up a hand and Chenle, eyes like stained glass, took it, pressing a kiss to his pulse point._

_“We’ll make it work.”_

_Chenle hummed a bit, mood no lighter than before. “Yeah.” He cleared his throat. “Yeah, we will.”_

_Jisung buried his head in Chenle’s lap and tried to ignore how it sounded less like an agreement and more like an assurement.)_

 

___

 

Dates never really did happen, not with a secret relationship. If the two of them did have one, it was nothing bigger than Chenle sneaking out onto Jisung’s fire escape in the dead of night, talking to Jisung through the window in quiet murmurs in hopes that they wouldn’t wake anyone up.

Vamps had better eyesight than hearing, according to Chenle, so they met at night when the Huangs were sleeping, chatting away under the stars, stealing kisses and holding hands.

It made up for what they couldn’t do during the daytime.

Sometimes, Chenle even snuck him onto the roof, Jisung clinging onto the vamps back like a giant, gangly koala and burying his head into the nape of Chenle’s neck to avoid the cold bite of the wind.

On the roof, they were free to giggle, to have tickle fights, to be as garish and funny and loving as they wanted.

Chenle would hold his hand, press butterfly kisses to the pulse point on his wrist - something Jisung had seen Renjun and Jaemin do to Jeno when they thought no one was paying attention.

“A bite mark on a pulse is like a mark of engagement,” Chenle explained one night, lips ghosting over Jisung’s skin.

The younger boy reached out to rub a thumb over the vamps cheekbone, but Chenle just caught his hand in his own, placing another peck to his wrist with a soft smile as he started to talk more. He’d been opening up after Jisung talked to him.

Keeping Jisung in the dark wasn’t protecting him, it just kept hi ignorant. It took a while for Chenle to learn that, but he’d made progress.

“We kiss over those areas a lot,” he said. “It’s like kissing a hand or a ring.”

Jisung hummed. “The wrist is more common, I guess?”

Chenle’s cheek dusted pale pink. “More intimate couples kiss on the neck. Other areas are the inner knee, the chest. There’s one on the pelvis. The wrist is … the most conservative, I guess, for public.”

Jisung had nodded a bit, not really knowing what to say. After a bit, Chenle had just curled up against him, laying an ear over Jisung’s heart and humming in bliss.

( _Chenle sighed, fingers fidgeting with the collar of Jisung’s shirt as he pressed his ear closer into the younger boys chest. Jisung carded his hand through the vamps ear, lips twitching up a bit at the content hum that buzzed from Chenle’s lips._

_The boy moved to peck at his boyfriends’ nose and Chenle let out a small giggle._

_“I love listening to your heart,” Chenle said after a bit, eyes closed. “It’s calming. None of us have any heartbeats, except Renjun and other mixed kids.”_

_Jisung let out a hum of understanding, smiling at how cute the vamp looked like this. He bent down, brushed his lips against the older boys cheeks, tracing invisible constellations on his pale skin._

_Chenle tickled at Jisung’s neck in return, eyes still closed._

_“Is that why you always curl up by me?” Jisung asked._

_Chenle nodded. “Yeah. That and you’re super hot.”_

_A beat passed, then another, before a snort bubbled past Jisung’s lips, breaking through the soft chill of the night._

_Chenle shot up on his elbows, eyes wide with embarrassment, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water, his fangs peeking out cutely behind his other teeth._

_Jisung, barely managing to keep himself together, reach outed the close the vamps unhinged jaw._

_“I meant warm!” Chenle sputtered. Damn, he was cute. “You’re super warm!”_

_“No take backsies,” Jisung giggled, leaning in to peck at his lips._

_Chenle huffed, leaned back down and mumbling to himself in Mandarin, a bit miffed as he rested his ear back against Jisung’s chest and promptly chastised the boy for laughing again._

_“Stoooop,” he whined. “It’s harder to hear you.”_

_Jisung rolled his eyes but swallowed down his laughs. It was rare to see Chenle so calm like this. He wasn’t as loud as he used to be, though part of that was just from growing up. But, still, Jisung could tell he’d been stressed lately. He needed this._

_They both did._

_He wound his hands back in Chenle’s hair, playing with the shorter strands at the nape of his neck. The silence settled back down over them, thick and heavy, but soothing, like a comforter during winter._

_“I was born with a heartbeat, you know,” Chenle said after a bit, cracking open an eye to look up at Jisung. Jisung nodded but stayed quiet._

_He’d had been talking more about culture now that Jisung pestered him more about it, but it was rarely about his life back home._

_Sure, he’d talk about his mom and dad, about his grandparents and older brother. When they were younger, when Chenle had barely even been in Korea for a year, he’d cry to Jisung that he missed his grandma’s hugs, and Jisung would just cuddle with him to make him feel better._

_But Chenle never really talked about home. He never talked about what his parents really did, about what their role was among other vamps. It had to be influential, seeing as Jisung couldn’t find any info about it on any human websites._

_Jisung knew he was ‘important,’ important enough that he wasn’t allowed to be with a human, but that was about it._

_So Jisung shut up and listened as his boyfriend spoke, drinking in the words and saving them in his head to remember._

_“That’s why everyone’s so protective of me,” Chenle explained. “It’s like when any of you guys are born without one.”_

_He paused a bit, worrying at the soft cotton of Jisung’s flannel with his fingers. “We started off as just over-complex, out of control necromancy, you know? Some witches made a few mistakes when trying to raise the dead and we happened. So we function off magic, all of us.”_

_Chenle laughed. “That’s why all those scientists keep failing trying to find out how we work. They refuse to believe there isn’t anything but science to it, but there honestly isn’t.”_

_Jisung blinked a bit. “There are witches?” he asked, the question slipping out before he could stop himself._

_“Yeah,” Chenle said. “It’s common knowledge. It’s literally one of the first things we told humans about when we made the deal to coexist.”_

_Jisung laughed a bit, shook his head. “Most people play it off as you all fucking around with us.”_

_He snorted, mumbling something that sounded a little like ‘tell that to Hyuck,’ under his breath, though Jisung could’ve been wrong. “What about werewolves?” the boy asked._

_“Those brats died off centuries ago,” Chenle explained. “Thank god.” He cleared his throat._

_“Anyways, so we’re not supposed to have heartbeats. If we do, the magic isn’t working. It’s passed down throughout bloodlines, the stronger the bloodline, the more power you have. If you’re weaker, or a lower status, you’re more likely to have a kid with a heartbeat. It won’t kill them right away, but …”_

_He paused._

_“Life isn’t good. They’re looked down upon, and most don’t make it past twenty. Which is really young, by the way.”_

_Jisung bit down on his tongue to keep himself from asking The Question_ _TM_ _. He had no idea how long Chenle had been ‘nine’ before he’d moved here, and he probably didn’t want to know._

_“Everybody was terrified. My grandparents, they … they worked really hard for where they got. My parents were born into their power, but my grandpa and grandpa weren’t, and … on top of me probably not living long, a ‘weaker’ bloodline would’ve ruined us. My parents, my aunts, my cousins, they would’ve been ridiculed and kicked out of the colony.”_

_Jisung rubbed at the vamp’s shoulder._

_“I was like that for a week before it stopped,” Chenle whispered. “I died, then I woke up a day later, completely normal.”_

_He looked up at Jisung, smiled a bit, moved some hair out of the younger boys eyes and brushed a knuckle over his cheek. “It’s why I’m here. They wanted me away for a while, wanted me safe.”_

_“Why wouldn’t you be safe?”_

_Chenle paused, his lips pursed. His eyes flicked down a bit, and Jisung backtracked. “It’s okay, you don’t have to-”_

_“There was a coup,” Chenle blurted, “At least, someone tried to do a coup. It was a few months before I came here. I, uh, there are laws, made by both humans and vamps, that we’re not allowed to endanger or meddle with humans’ daily lives. That includes mixed people because they’re registered as human over vamp since they don’t need blood, so …”_

_“So they sent you to live with Renjun and his parents.”_

_“Yeah. It’s a bit better now,” Chenle mumbled. “I could probably go back, probably shoulder since I need to meet with Yukhei again, but...” He glanced up at Jisung, a soft smile spreading on his lips._

_“I might have to make a few excuses for me to stay.”_

_Jisung laughed, running a hand through the vamps hair again. Chenle practically purred, leaning more into Jisung’s chest as his eyes fluttered shut._

_They stayed like that for a while, Jisung craning his head back to watch the stars, Chenle snuggled against him, his breathing - as useless and adorable as ever - evening out in time with Jisung’s heart._

_Excuse to stay... Had they already asked him to go back to China? He bit his lip, pulling his hand from Chenle’s hair. The vamp whined in protest, scooching closer to Jisung’s warmth._

_“Chenle,” Jisung mumbled. Chenle hummed out a quick response, shifting to look the younger boy in the eye. “I won’t leave you, so ... don’t leave. We’ll make it work, so ... I just ...  I ...”_

_Jisung breathed in, rested his head against Chenle’s, relished in the way Chenle’s skin cooled him down._

_“Please don’t leave.”_

_Chenle’s fingers found his shoulder, grip firm and unrelenting. Jisung always forgot how strong he really was._

_The vamp pushed a bit, and Jisung leaned back as Chenle stared at him for a few seconds, searching for something, before he pressed forwards, put his lips to Jisung’s and whispered, “I’ll never leave you. Never.”_

_Jisung tried to ignore the quiver in his voice.)_

 

___

 

Months passed after that, all spent meeting up behind the school’s gym before school, sneaking off to the rooftops at night, whispering and giggling to each other through each other's windows during sunrise.

Chenle spent countless hours sneaking into Jisung’s house to cuddle while the Park’s were away, only to scramble off into the fire escape when Jisung’s mom came home and Jisung had to listen to ask his mom if Chenle could “come over to study.”

Jisung tried to wash the pained expression off his face after his mom started to go on about how Chenle was always welcome, about how his and Jisung’s friendship was always nice to see.

He tried to hide it, he always tried, but as soon as Chenle, pretending like he hadn’t just been spooning Jisung on the couch while watching dramas ten minutes ago, flounced in the front door, the vamp knew.

Those days weren’t always hard, but they hurt, a silent reminder, an extra reminder, of what could be.

Chenle would squeeze Jisung’s hand hard once they got into Jisung’s room, would press a chaste kiss to the boy's lips and whisper countless apologies as they opened their textbooks and started to ‘study.’

They weren’t necessarily a normal couple, not like Jisung minded. The time they spent together made Jisung feel infinite, complete, but … but it was different.

Sometimes he’d lie awake at night wondering if maybe, just maybe, he’d done exactly what Renjun had asked him, had just given Chenle the ‘juice box’ and kept it at that. Chenle would’ve thought he had a crush on Mark, would’ve left the situation be, and maybe he’d move on.

Maybe the both of them would’ve. Maybe they’d still find out how to be happy in their own way, would be able to openly hang out on their own, because even if they were caught, they’d be able to prove it as nothing, because that’s all it would be.

Maybe Chenle wouldn’t have to worry over not letting his family down, about not making life even harder for the Huangs, who already suffered so much. Maybe he wouldn’t have to choose between the Shanghai colony and Jisung.

Maybe it would’ve hurt, for a while, but maybe it would’ve stopped. Maybe thing didn’t have to change.

Sometimes, Jisung felt like all the hardships, all the inconvenience his love created for Chenle, all the sadness for him that spawned from that inconvenience, was just to great to be outweighed by the warmth of Chenle’s stolen kisses, by the ocean reflected galaxies in his eyes, by the way his fingers felt when interlaced with Jisung's.

Sometimes it hurts too much to understand, sometimes it doesn’t feel like it’s worth it.

But most of the time it does.

The crinkles under Chenle’s eyes make it worth it. The breathy, high pitched laughs when Jisung makes him laugh says it’s worth it. The whines and huffs he lets out when Jisung annoys him say the same. The way he snuggles up to Jisung when he can, the way he can melt Jisung’s heart in a split second, the way he hums and sings and laughs and loves make Jisung think maybe the secrets don’t outweigh it all.

Sometimes he lies awake and wishes it was easier, sometimes he thinks they’re perfect the way they are.

Jisung doesn’t know how he should feel, if he should want more, expect less. If he should give in, let it happen. If he should give up trying to fight what both he and Chenle knew was going to happen.

He doesn’t know how he should feel, but all he knows is he’s irresistibly, inexplicably in love with Zhong Chenle, and he would never change that for the world.

  
  
  


___

  
  
  


 

He knew it was going to happen before anyone even told him. He could see it in the vamps face, in the way Renjun looked at them in despair. He could see it in Chenle, how he was always worrying at his lips and checking his phone.

He knew, but he didn’t say anything. Just kept quiet in the background because no one knew. They all saw Jisung as Chenle’s best friend, as the obligatory, awkward one time crush that had finally passed nearly a year ago.

So he was quiet, he let it happen, only put up as much of a protest as the others did.

No one was allowed to know.

And so no one ever did.

 

 

 

___

 

_(Jisung, finally seventeen and heartbroken for the first time, didn’t cry. He didn’t have it in him, not for days, not for weeks or months, even._

_It wasn’t until after Renjun finished his first semester in college, almost five months after_ he _left, when Jisung and Renjun sat alone in Renjun’s room staring at the blank wall where_ his _posters had once been, that Jisung finally broke._

_“I’m sorry,” Renjun had said as Jisung cried softly into his hyung’s chest. “You just have to wait, Jisung-ah, he’ll come back. Just wait.”_

_“Was it broken off?” Jisung tried through his tears. “With Hong Kong?”_

_Renjun froze. Jisung wasn’t supposed to know, he knew that. He also knew that admitting that he knew gave more away than he should’ve. But Renjun couldn’t do anything against them, not now._

_The older boy bit his lip, obviously at odds with himself, then, “Just wait, Jisung,” he said._

_And he did._

_He waited and waited, Skyping every night for months … until the Skypes fell apart, turning into sad excused of voice calls for another month. That was when he’d gone to Renjun._

_Then the calls turned into KKT messaging. That lasted the longest, maybe a good four months, but that too just seemed to … fade._

_In the end, the messages turned into an occasional like on Instagram or maybe a retweet on Twitter._

_After years and years and years, after millions of hours and countless more seconds of being by each other's’ side, after an infinite number of moments spent stealing kisses, spent holding hands under the table, spent ‘studying’ in Jisung’s room and sneaking off to watch the stars, it’d finally happened._

_He’d had to do it, Jisung told himself. It was his responsibility._

_But, at the end of it all, he’d left._

_Jisung might’ve been home, but he wasn’t Home._

_He tried to pretend it hurt less than it really did.)_

  
  
  


Chenle moves back to China.

  
  
  


And that’s that.

  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wasn't able to work it into the story, and probably won't be able to, but when chenle confesses you hear him talk about how donghyuck lied to him and said jisung had a crush on mark. he actually wasn't playing a prank. what happened was:
> 
> \- a few days before the Confession Smackdown, chenle explained to hyuck what was going on and said that he was thinking he might be able to confess to jisung because he thought jisung also liked him, and maybe they'd be able to have a secret relationship and donghyuck could help them out
> 
> \- donghyuck, knowing about the situation as a whole, politics and everything, ( for reasons i won't spoil ) lied and said jisung had a secret crush on mark and that's why he was avoiding the group. he, and the rest of the group, still thinks chensung are good friends
> 
> ALSO!!
> 
> I've decided to turn WTLCO into a prologue since I'm spending so much time on the resolution. I really don't want to keep everyone waiting too much, so just know that if you want to stop following the story, it 'ends' after chap 3. The 'sequel' will be coming out soonish. I know it's been forever, and I'm really sorry for everyone who's been following this for months. You'll get a resolution ... kind of. As for any spoilers ... well, the sequel is inspired by Dear John by Taylor Swift, so .... :)

**Author's Note:**

> As you can see, chapter 1 is relatively short. The plot really starts to pick up next chap, so stay tuned~~~ *finger guns away*


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